For those of us who had the fortune to grow up with good moms, her work is visible to those we lead.

Families, kids, and communities benefit from the work and commitment of a good mom. In the process kids learn values, good manners, work ethic and many more of the foundations necessary for a good life of positive contribution. I’ve benefited from three.

Mom taught love, kindness, accountability, and good manners. I also periodically got some tough love. We lived about 8 blocks from the community swimming pool in a California neighborhood where summer temperatures reached 1100.  I did not want to walk home barefoot on the hot asphalt so I took Teddy Bustos’ bike from where it leaned against the community pool fence. That day or another, I stole a candy bar from the local drug store. In both cases I was marched by the ear to face the victim of my crime, confess, return the item, apologize, commit to no further crimes, and pay the consequences.

Grandma was the model of hard-working entrepreneur and taught work ethic, accomplishment, and empathy. At 6 years old I “helped” delivery men unload produce, groceries, milk, and bread from their trucks to the shelves of Grandma’s neighborhood grocery store. At 8 years old I delivered groceries to the people in the neighborhood she called shut-ins. She tolerated no slacking, provided big encouragement, opportunities, and candy to me and my pals.

Now, my mother-in-law plays the mom role. No mother-in-law jokes here because I’m on the short list of people who got a good one. Her lesson in commitment was profoundly demonstrated through her care of husband who died of Alzheimer’s disease at 68 years old. Generosity, robust dialogue, a young spirit, and a family value of champagne cocktail hour every afternoon combine to make her the honored matriarch for 3 generations of family and countless friends.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms who have done and are doing the hard work to send responsible, compassionate, contributing citizens out into the world.

You don’t have to be a mom to provide tough love when it is needed. Tough love without the love, however, is something entirely different. I’m the Outsider and that’s what I think.